Wedding dream

Last night I dreamed I was having my wedding. Since my subconscious is much more creative than my conscious mind, I thought I'd write down some of these ideas before I forget them.

Here are some things that I liked:
Mozart playing while people were sitting (but where am I going to find an oboe player?)
I didn't have to plan anything. Somehow it had all been done for me.
I looked pretty awesome. I was wearing a purple dress for some reason.
Courtney and Thad were there. Their outfits were pretty awesome, too. But Josiah was late for some reason.

Here are some things that I didn't like:
It was inside.
Everything felt rushed.
I didn't recognize any of my bridesmaids.
I forgot to write my vows.

Hm. Maybe this dream wasn't really about my wedding. Oh, well. I liked it, and when I woke up I was happy. Then I remembered that I probably didn't get into the Spain program, and I don't know if I can be in today's dance performance because I missed the rehearsal (not my fault -- I was locked out of the building!). So it's back to reality. It kind of made me want to start planning my wedding, but I think I need to get this paper published first. Maybe if I don't get into Spain I can go to NH and look for some good spots this summer.

I wish the sun would come out. These clouds are getting kind of old.

Stolen seafood and dying hair dreams

There was a vending machine that gave out bags of frozen food. I put in the last of my money and selected some frozen scallops or something. Then I turned away for a second, and some guy came and got some food from the machine, and when I turned back, my scallops were gone. I got really mad and found the guy (he was already eating) and asked him if he had seen my scallops. He said no, but I could smell that he was eating seafood. I was really hungry, too.

***

I went to a hair salon with my sister. They were having some kind of special where you could try all kinds of hair dyes (I've never dyed my hair, so I don't know how this actually works). In this place, though, they had a bunch of containers of hair dye and paint brushes, and you painted the dye onto your hair. First I painted mine bright yellow, which I didn't really like, so then I painted it blue. And for some reason the blue canceled out the yellow and left it looking brown again. Then I got the bill and it was something like $100, and I didn't know how I was going to pay it.

***

These seem to indicate that I'm worried about money right now, but that isn't really true. Hm. Maybe it's just a bunch of stuff that happened.

Wanted: Science Monkey

Position open for enthusiastic, motivated monkey able to perform simple scientific tasks. Tasks include: staring at HPLC computer screen, staring at mass spec computer screen, freezing things, and evaporating things. Humans need not apply. Payment in bananas.

I put the "con" in confrontation.

I have to talk to M this afternoon about conference attendance and I DON'T WANT TO!!!

I can't get into the details right now but in a nutshell, I want to go to something, and he may or may not be okay with it.

I am not a happy camper.

I doubt I will be able to concentrate for the rest of the day.

Taking criticism is hard.

I got an 85 on my Mars sugar paper, and an A- in the class.

That's good, right?

I received comments from both my professor and my classmates on the paper. Unfortunately, I think my professor was a little disappointed in it.

Or maybe I am over-emphasizing the constructive criticism.

What kind of ticks me off is, I agree with most of the comments that were made (and knew that they would be made even as I was writing it), but I just didn't have enough time to fix it. I wrote the paper in a hurry and thus didn't produce my best work.

I think the reason that it took me so long was because I was treading in largely unfamiliar territory.

I guess one thing I learned was, if you're going to write a real grant proposal, you should have someone else take a look at it before you submit it. And of course that means finishing the first draft well in advance.

I've been doing quite a bit of self-reflection in my teacher training this week.

I need to try to be more confident in my own ideas.

Someone today suggested that I try practicing some confrontational-type situations with other teachers to get over my fear of confrontation. I thought this was a pretty great idea, but I don't know if I'll do it or not. It would be very, very hard for me.

Maybe there is some kind of seminar I can take on that subject...and I don't just want to get one of those self-help books...

At least I don't have swine flu.

I got hit by a nasty cold this week, and given that I had hung out with people last weekend who had been sick (and may or may not have been on a plane with a sick person from Mexico), I freaked out a little bit. Only a little bit, though, since I didn't have a fever. And wouldn't you know it, I went to the doctor just to make sure I didn't need antibiotics or anything, and they said it was just a cold. My sinuses are still kind of bothering me, but other than that, I feel okay.

I have a week-long training session this week for my teaching-leader-type job next year. I looked over the schedule and it looks like a lot of "What does the word "team" mean to you?" kind of crap. I'm trying to be positive about it, but I'm not sure how I'm going to get through the week. Maybe the reason I don't like this stuff is because I'm not very good at it. I've discovered recently that I'm really bad at articulating abstract concepts. Maybe the better you get at science, the worse you get at abstract thought.

At least I get to go to California next weekend.

Why is my Phe-UMP solution chunky? It's not supposed to be. This is worse than trying to cook.

Yup, I'm at lab again. I decided I need to work this weekend since I'll be at the training thing next week.

Everything will be better in June.

Almost done...

I'm looking forward to summer for so many reasons.

Even though my astrobiology class was awesome, it will be nice to not have to be in class at 9:30 AM two days a week anymore. I like to maintain a relatively early schedule, but some days, I could really use another hour of sleep. After our mock proposal review on Monday, and a one-page summary (which is nothing, after the paper I just wrote), I'll be done.

I'll be going to Seattle for an astrobiology grad student conference. I'll also be giving a talk there. I'm still waiting to hear about Spain. Hopefully, if I am accepted, I'll be able to go to both things, but I'm not sure if M will let me. He can be kind of weird about giving people time off sometimes. I think it will depend on how much work I can get done in the meantime, but unfortunately these decisions have to be made pretty soon...

I like the warm weather. I like riding my bike to school and not having to wear a jacket.

I look forward to dancing as much as possible, since I won't have much else going on besides lab work.

Right now I have to get as much work done as possible, since I have a week-long training session in a couple of weeks. I haven't reminded M yet. I wanted to get some good data first. This is probably not the best idea, but it's what I'm doing. The timing for this training session could not be worse; I need to try to finish this project before I go to a conference at the end of the month.

And on that note, it's off to work...